when i was in high school, my church put on a musical... i hardly remember what it was about... it involved riding on a bus... playing on the beach... a girl that felt left out... stereotypical coming-of-age stuff... though i hardly remember the plot, i have a hard time forgetting some of the songs...

what is it about me that's different from the rest? what is it about me? i've tried and tried my best... to figure out what's really wrong... why it is i don't belong... why they are the way they are to me... if only for a moment, i could be one of them...

really cheezy stuff, i know. why is it that i'm up at 2am and recalling these lyrics?

it's not that i feel lonely... or that i don't have friends (i have friends! hahah)... i just feel awkward here (geographically, temporally, philosophically). the people i talk to seem to want different things from life... from love... they look at a picture and see one thing; i look at it and hear a sappy, church-musical song. i realize that i'm the minority...i'm the solitary one in the bottom-right corner dancing to a different beat (one of these things is not like the others...). the funny thing is, it's so easy to jump into the neighboring box. i can fake my way through this song. it's easier to mouth their lyrics than to write my own.

how long to sing this song?
how long to sing this song?
how long?
how long?
how long?
how long to sing this song?